“I know there’s something here. I know you want more. Tell me…and it’s yours.”
“No time spent with you is wasted.”
“God, you’re sucking all the fun out of our friendship.”
“If I’m yours and you’re mine…then I will take you, wherever and whenever I can.”
“There were so many secrets between us now, it was hard remembering a time when things had been simple & easy, when it had felt like pure puppy love. I suppose all love eventually comes back down to earth.”
It was heartfelt, it was heartbreaking. It was extreme joy, it was bone-crushing grief. It was fiery hot, it was icy-cold. It was true love sprouting… it was true love dying.
It’s like we were both trying to hold onto something that was slipping through our fingers, and we didn’t understand why.”
“He spoke rapidly in-between his tender kisses. “I love you. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. The women…I was so scared to touch you. You didn’t want me…I couldn’t take the pain. I tried to get over you. Every time with them, I was with you. I’m so sorry…I love you.”
“Between pants, I continued spewing how much I hated him. Around my lips, he kept telling me I didn’t.”
“What if I don’t choose you, Kellan? What will you do?”
He looked away, a tear rolling down his cheek. “I’ll leave, Kiera. I’ll leave, and you and Denny can have your happily ever after.” He looked back at me. “You wouldn’t even need to tell him about me. Eventually, the two of you…” his voice broke and another tear fell on his cheek, “the two of you would get married, and have children, and have a great life.”
I fought back a sob. “And you? What happens to you in that scenario?”
“I…get by. And I miss you, every day,” he whispered.”
“I think in the end, you would have stayed with me, out of obligation…or maybe comfort. Maybe I was safe to you, and you needed to feel that. I know how scared you get of the unknown. To you…I must be kind of a security blanket.”
“I want to be someone’s everything. I want fire and passion, and love that’s returned, equally. I want to be someone’s heart.”
After not seeing him for months, his perfection was almost too much to take in all at once, like I’d go blind if I didn’t absorb him in segments.”
“His eyes were still closed and his body rocked gently to the music, but his face was almost…desolate. His words matched his face, as he sang about how each day was a struggle, and never seeing my face caused him physical pain. He sang that “my face was his light, and he felt drenched in darkness without it.” Tears fell freely after I heard that line.”
He relaxed and looked at my lips and then my eyes and then back to my lips. “How do we do that? This is what we do…back and forth, back and forth. You want me, you want him. You love me, you love him. You like me, you hate me, you want me, you don’t want me, you love me…you leave me. There’s so much that went wrong before…”
“I don’t know how to let you back in.” My heart beat spiked and I closed my eyes when he whispered,” I don’t know how to keep you out either.”
Amazing writing in this book peeps.
I’m working on a special post for all you Kellan fans btw
You can read my review of Thoughtless here.